Adoption Information
Grief & Loss

Beneath the Mask: Understanding Adopted Teens
Debbie, John Riley, Meeks Books
This book offers parents and professionals a wealth of case histories; and treatment resources and therapy tools. Parents will discover the 6 most common adoption "stuck-spots;" a deeper understanding of identity, abandonment, grief and loss, and relinquishment issues - and how they affect personal and family development; and how therapy may help the adoptive family learn and grow together.

Beneath the Mask: Understanding Adopted Teens (CD)
Debbie Riley
NACAC Conference presenter Debbie Riley addresses complexities of adolescence for the adopted teen – identity, abandonment, grief and loss, relinquishment – and how adolescence affects personal and family development. Discover six common adoption “stuck-spots,” a step-by-step assessment on adoption, clinical intervention strategies, and therapy tools.

A Child's Journey Through Placement
Vera Fahlberg Books
Some children wander in and out of foster care, mental health facilities, and juvenile justice programs throughout their childhoods. This book provides the foundation of resources and tools to help professionals and parents support these children as they grow. While a bit technical and "social worky," it helps families understand why kids move and how their moves affect them. Though lacking in information on fetal alcohol effects, it is, overall, very helpful with good information.

Grief Recovery Handbook, The: The Action Program for Moving Beyond Death Divorce, and Other Losses
John W. and Russell Friedman James Books
This book, for those who are grieving any kind of loss, offers a gentle action plan and provides direction during a difficult, confusing and often disorienting time. It is divided into three parts, “Seeing the Problem,” “Preparing for Change: Starting to Recover,” and “Finding the Solution.”

Helping Children Cope with Separation and Loss
Claudia Jewett Jarratt Books
This step-by-step guide for any concerned adult offers warm advice, specific techniques and innovative ideas for helping children overcome the sadness, anger and anxiety resulting from divorce, death, absence, adoption, foster care, and sibling loss.

Adopted Teens Only: A Survival Guide to Adolescence
Danea Gorbett Children's Books
This guide for adopted teens addresses issues that parents are often reluctant or unable to discuss with their teenagers: what feelings and thoughts are common to the adoptive experience; what adoptive parents feel; what birth parents feel; what emotional issues are connected with search and reunion; and how to talk to parents about adoption questions.

Adoption Healing: A Path to Recovery
Joe Soll Books
In this book, the author, a psychotherapist, lecturer, former university professor, founder and director of Adoption Crossroads, Adoption Counseling Center, and New York State Adoption Agency Task Force, and himself an adoptee, presents the world of adoption from his own unique perspective, offering myths, facts, exercises, and quotes to augment chapters on a wide range of adoption related issues.

The Adoption Mystique
Joanne Wolf Small Books

Much of what’s been written and said about adoption—the definitions, myths, interpretations, and so on—was generated by non-adopted persons, and often without benefit of adopted person’s input. This book was written by an adopted person who hopes to paint a picture of the social welfare system that contrasts with the traditional view and sheds a new light on the situation.

Adoption Trilogy, The: Three films by Jean Strauss (DVD)
Jean Strauss
"Holding Hands", 2006, examines the relationship between Strauss and her brother, Bobby. Separated through adoption and reunited as adults, Strauss was with her brother when he died. The film addresses the issue of lifelong sibling severance in adoption and foster care. Multi-award winning short, "The Triumvirate” 2004, tells the story of Strauss’s reunion with her birthmother and birth grandmother. "Vital Records" 2005, was created to help legislators understand the debate on legislation which would provide access for adoptees to their original records.

Real Parents, Real Children: Parenting the Adopted Child
Holly van Gulden Books
This book offers insight into how adopted children commonly think and feel about being adopted. It explains how and why they grieve for their birth parents and suggests ways that adoptive parents can help them come to a healthy resolution of this grief.

Separation & Loss Issues for Foster & Birth Families (DVD)
The pain of separation and loss is the universal experience of every foster child. Dr. Fahlberg talks with foster parents, foster teenagers, and adults who spent their teen years in foster care. They offer insight on how to lessen the impact of transition and strengthen a child's relationship with both foster and birth parents. Includes: 14-page Discussion Guide and review quiz.

Reflection Pond
Jaiya John Books
Through allegory and parable, poetry and prose, Jaiya John, author of Black Baby White Hands, draws from the natural world around us to unveil the magical inner life of children and youth. Here is a revelatory positioning of the human mirror.

Adoption Wisdom: A Guide to the Issues and Feelings of Adoption
Marlou Russell Books
This book combines quotations from birth parents, adoptive parents and adoptees with brief observations from the author, a psychologist and adoptee, herself, in reunion with her birth family. In chapters with such titles as "The Adoption Triad," "Basic Truths of Adoption," "Loss and Grief in Adoption," "Search and Reunion," "Before Choosing Adoption," and others, this book sheds a unique light on the world of adoption through the commentary of those who live that world every day.

Helping Children of Divorce and Adopted Children with Emotional Problems (2-VHS)
Michael Katz Videotapes
In this two-tape program, Dr Katz describes behaviors that frequently occur, explains how emotional problems develop and how they produce behavioral problems, demonstrates appropriate responses and positive interventions that help children form healthy attachments, teaches specific ways to help children learn positive behaviors and responses to an often frustrating world, and shows how to reinforce verbal ideas with concrete, real life, experiences.

Primal Wound, The: Understanding the Adopted Child
Nancy Newton Verrier Books
By applying information about pre-and perinatal psychology, attachment, bonding, and loss, this book clarifies the effects on adopted children of separation from the birthmother. It also gives those children, whose pain has long been unacknowledged or misunderstood, validation for their feelings, as well as explanations for their behavior. The insight it brings to the experience of abandonment and loss will contribute to the healing of adoptees, their adoptive families, and birthparents.

Being Adopted: The Lifelong Search for Self
David Brodzinsky Books
This book, based on Eric Erikson's seven stage life cycle model, will open doors for adoptees who at one time or another have wondered why they felt a particular way and had no place to turn for the answer. * There is a hard cover and a paperback.

Beneath a Tall Tree
Jean Strauss Books
Strauss begins by telling the story of her childhood with her adoptive parents, whom she loved dearly, and her difficult relationship with her troubled adoptive brother. She goes on to write about her search for, and ultimate reunion with, her birth mother, her birth mother's birth mother, her seven siblings, and, briefly, her birth father. By the end of the book the fifth grader, who knew nothing about her biological roots, has discovered she's a Mayflower descendent, whose ancestors go back to Charlemagne.

Sibling Connection, The : Keeping Brothers & Sisters Together Through Adoption (DVD)
This documentary combines footage of adopted siblings and adoption professionals and dramatizations of the childhoods of some of the adopted siblings to demonstrate the importance of keeping siblings together whenever possible and to keep them in touch when same-home placements are not possible.

What Children Need When They Grieve
Julia Wilcox Rathkey Books
This Book explores the scope of a child’s reactions to death, including grief and fear. It gives advice on how to talk to your child and how to recognize their need for privacy and what adults should do and refrain from doing. Rathkey explains the four essentials that every grieving child needs: routine, love, honesty, and security.

Living with an Angry Child (2 Audiotapes) or (3 CD's)
Holly van Gulden Audiotapes
Adopted children struggling with unresolved loss or poor attachment often exhibit acute episodes of rage and chronic or intermittent patterns of passive-aggressive non compliance. These behaviors can and do trigger angry responses – sometimes even rage – in parents and siblings. This double workshop with Holly van Gulden analyzes anger and rage, and offers techniques for avoiding continual battles, managing healthy anger resolution, de-escalating rage episodes, and establishing a healthy, joyful family environment.

Seven Core Issues in Adoption, The (DVD)
Sharon Kaplan & Deborah N. Roszia & Silverstein
Adoption is a life long, inter-generational process, which unites birth parents, adoptees and adoptive parents forever. It triggers seven lifelong issues for all triad members -- grief, rejection, guilt, loss, identity, control, and intimacy. Recognizing these similarities, triad members and professionals can reduce the adversarial nature of adoption and improve understanding.

Twenty Things Adopted Kids Wish Their Adoptive Parents Knew
Sherrie Eldridge Books
This book, written by a woman who was adopted, herself, gives voice to children’s unspoken concerns and shows adoptive parents how to free their kids from feelings of fear, abandonment and shame. Eldridge reveals twenty complex emotional issues you must understand to nurture the child you love.

Why Didn't She Keep Me? Answers to the Question Every Adopted Child Asks
Barbara Burlingham-Brown Books
These twenty stories from birth mothers in their own words might provide insight and reassurance to any adoptee. We might not know what your birthmother’s story is, but here are some of the reasons why mothers have chosen adoption for their children.

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